ok I figured it out! It hit me just like that this morning and I have to get it out really quickly hopefully before church! My giving for Christmas needs to be to someone I know, I have been praying for so much and who really needs it.
My friend Jenny has meant so much to me, taught me sooo much over the years and now her family is in need. She is giving her life to the Lord through her beautiful gift of music but it is not always easy. They have had soo may things in their way this year. They just canceled a few shows for the first time ever due to family emergencies in the band.
Again I don't know exactly what I'll give, but now I know who. They had a wonderful baby girl this year and she deserves a perfect Christmas. Jenny and Ryan are a great cute and they deserve a date night or two. Ohhh I cannot wait!!! I don't want to ask for anything but if anyone (of my 3 little readers) wants to help bless this amazing family let me know! They are so deserving! If anything would you join me in praying for Jenny, Ryan, little Annie, and the rest of the amazing band or Addison Road.

Is it just me or does all the gift giving take some of the joy out of the holidays?
Don't get me wrong, maybe I should explain a little. One of my favorite parts about Christmas is a day that my mom and I spend baking pies and breads and fudge and pecan clusters and whatever else we think up that year. We put them in baskets and on plates and give them to neighbors and friends. Love it. So fun! The kinds of gift giving I don't really get a whole lot of joy out of: It is 2 weeks before Christmas, life is busy, I don't have a "list" to give my parents, Douglas doesn't know what I want, I don't know what I want (if we are honest it is because life would be just as great and just the same if we didnt get as much stuff).

It is just something that has really been on my heart lately. I know that gift giving should not be out of necessity, but for so many at this time it is right now. And often, at times like Christmas and birthdays we feel like we are owed something. I don't feel right spending $100s on gifts just to add to a blue ray collection of 57 or a shoe collection of 32. In just the same I don't feel right receiving that much. This is not to say that I won't give gifts to those I love... or accept some. Lets just scale down and spread the wealth!

To be honest, a lot of this has selfish motives. The stress of finding "the perfect gift" or deciding just what you want has taken a little from what I loved about Christmas as a child. And really and truly to think of the joy I could bring to someone who might get nothing. I might be a little late on this whole thing, but there is always need somewhere.